live in North Carolina, which is a backward state with stupid laws.
In order to change your name here, a clerk of court has to decide that you have sufficient reason to change your name.
I have a surname that I feel like I need to change, and I'm not getting married or divorced any time soon.
I don't mean that I just don't like the last name. The last name upsets me so much that it causes me constant emotional pain. No one understands why it bugs me, but it's gotten to the point that I can't bear it anymore. As a kid, I hated it, all my life, I struggled to accept it. I'm well over 18 now, and I am constantly emotionally torn up over the name. I just hate how my first and last names sound together... I cringe when I hear it. I would rather have a root canal than have to speak or write that name.
My FULL name is VERY common. A common FIRST name isn't so bad, but a common FULL name is really upsetting to me. I constantly run across people with the same full name as me, and it makes me feel like less of an individual. A full name should uniquely identify only you. I want a name I can cherish, and I can't help but hate a name that gets me lost in the crowd. In the local library database, there are 20 people with the same full name. I can't get on a plane and fly like a normal person because I'm always getting confused with someone on a government watch list. There is even a MOVIE CHARACTER with my same full name! It's extremely plain and generic. It makes me feel like a common person, a nobody. I feel like people need to have a special sense of identity. I want a name all my own.
I just can't identify with a name that makes me feel like some generic product, mass produced from a mold in some factory. It just makes me crazy to have to answer to a name like that. I feel like everyone deserves to have a sense of identity and a special name.
I don't like my first name but don't wanna change it. I don't want to be named Martha, or Bertha (no offense if that's your name). It was picked out for me.
Second the last name is VERY All American. I'm not putting America down, but I am REALLY proud that I have Spanish heritage. It upsets me to the point that it makes me crazy to have an American last name, because the Spanish culture means so much to me. I hate having a last name that disassociates me from the Spanish part of my heritage. I speak fluent Spanish and I've lived in a Latin country and Hispanic is in my blood, and I feel like I need to have a link to that. Sure, I can tell people all day long but that's JUST NOT GOOD ENOUGH. Anyone can claim to have Spanish blood, I can tell people that I'm a capybara, but it doesn't mean anything. People know your heritage by your last name. The surname upsets me because people think I don't have Hispanic ancestry, and of course I do. I'm mixed with maybe 20 different nationalities, but I identify with the Spanish part of me more. I feel that way about my Irish ancestry as well. Before I knew about my ancestry, I expressed a longing to speak Spanish and be part of the latin world. I remember being 4 or 5 and telling my mom how I thought Spanish was the most beautiful language and how I wished I'd been Spanish or Mexican and I listened to music in Spanish and it didn't even feel like a foreign language. I don't believe that was a coincidence that I felt that way. At first I was happy when I found out I really DID have Hispanic ancestors.
Then the last name spoiled everything for me.
My Spanish ancestor had a beautiful surname, and I think it's a shame for a beautiful last name like that to just be lost. I would like to take my Spanish ancestor's surname, or at least hyphenate it to my old name. My Irish ancestor also had a beautiful last name as well.
A lot of people would probably judge me and say that I'm being dramatic but I can't help my feelings. When all's said and done, a name is what represents you. The name has always been upsetting to me, but it's gotten to the point that I'm in constant emotional pain. I just want a name I can cherish and love.
Furthermore, most of my friends who are girls are getting married, and getting beautiful Spanish surnames. I really care about my friends and am hapy that they are happy, but I feel angry and resentful sometimes. I feel angry that they can use a Spanish surname and I can't and the unfairness of it angers me... I actually have Spanish ancestry and I feel like if anyone deserves a Spanish last name, it's me. I've accepted that I may never get married, but the horrible name is too upsetting to bear.
I'm in emotional pain all the time. If I don't get rid of this horrible name, I'll just go crazy! I really need a solution. Please help me.
What is a good solution?? Can't stand last name, but need sufficient reason to change it?
You could try establishing residency in another state that has more reasonable (to you) name-change rules and then make it happen? Except for official documents like passport and birth certificate and such, you could just go about calling yourself whatever you want -- like for example start hyphenating the name you like unto yours (a common Spanish tradition), then eventually over the years start dropping the part you don't like? Just some random ideas off the top of my head...
[adding]
You could explain to the clerk that you have to travel A LOT for business and the %26quot;no fly list%26quot; hangups are severely curtailing your ability to make a living?
What is a good solution?? Can't stand last name, but need sufficient reason to change it?
There's no harm in just going in and trying to change it. If they don't let you, maybe come back and think up a new plan?
